Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Randomize
