He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
my being single is dangerous.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
Randomize
