You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
