Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
