so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
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