I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
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