new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
