It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
