Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I'm doing blow on my fuzzy rug
Come join me
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
Randomize
