Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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