her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
