Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize