we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
i dont even mind you always shaving my pubes when i pass out, i'm starting to find it liberating.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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