Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
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