OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
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