with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
