We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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