Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
