I could have mohawked her pubes.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
Randomize
