I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
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