theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
