The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
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