You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
