Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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