Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Randomize
