worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I'm high and having a granola buffet this has got to be the healthiest I have ever been
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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