no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
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