Can Purell be used as lube?
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
i think the title to my autobiography shall be, "a bottle of vodka and various pieces of meat"
and this is why you're my favorite gay friend.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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