I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
My dick has a subreddit
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
