he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
the worst part about living alone is not having other peoples snacks to mooch off of when you havent gone grocery shopping in three weeks. i'm so pms-y i'm about to eat a soy sauce packet
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Randomize
