Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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