I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize
