So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize