that's an acceptable place to lick
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
He didn't seem too mad about the puke on the side of his car. You still have a chance.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize
