okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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