Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
