I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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