Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Randomize
