Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
You can't just leave with hair like that
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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