So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
You know what's fun. When your getting a new mattress and you forget you put your vibrator under your old mattress and the moving guy finds it
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Randomize
