I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
I just made out with a guy for $7.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
