Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
and i thought it was paint or jizz but it was cheese
please tell me you didnt taste test that
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
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