Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Randomize