Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize