I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
We don't watch enough power rangers
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Randomize