So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Last night she showed me how to clean my bowl and now she's drunk making peanut butter filled cookies. Best. Roommate. Ever.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
