Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize
