On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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