if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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