even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize