I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
